Hi JB

Not original I am afraid but here's some old saws from a report on insurance excuses - I nearly wet myself when I read the last one from your post!!!

Cheers

Royston



"I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident."

"The other car collided with mine without giving warning of it's intention."

"I thought my window was down, but found it was up when I put my hand through it."

"I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat, found that I had a fractured skull."

"I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way."

"A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face." (no damage there luckily)

"A pedestrian hit me and went under my car."

"The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him."

"I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment."

"I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection, a hedge sprang up, obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car."

"The accident occurred when I was attempting to bring my car out of a skid by steering it into the other vehicle."

"In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole."

"I was driving my car out of the driveway in the usual manner, when it was struck by the other car in the same place it had been struck several times before."

"I was on my way to the doctor's with rear-end trouble when my universal joint gave way, causing me to have an accident."

"As I approached the intersection, a stop sign suddenly appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident."

"The telephone pole was approaching fast. I was attempting to swerve out of it's path, when it struck my front end."

"To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian."

"I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road when I ran him over."

"My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle."

"An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my vehicle and vanished."

"When I saw I could not avoid a collision, I stepped on the gas and crashed into the other car."

"The pedestrian had no idea which direction to go, so I ran him over."

"I saw the slow-moving, sad-faced old gentleman as he bounced off the hood of my car."

"Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have."

"I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows."

"The indirect cause of this accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth."


Royston